Tears

I once heard about a man who, upon hearing the name of Jesus would weep. I remember thinking that this was a bit weird. However, I am beginning to understand how he could be moved by something so simple as a name.

The name of Jesus while simple is powerful because it helps convey who he is. Let me try to illustrate with a story from my own life.

I have MS and it is not fun, in fact my life has changed and I have changed. I am one of those people who lives with daily pain and fatigue along with other symptoms. Even though I have medication to help with the symptoms I have had very few days without pain.

Recently I have received a grace from Christ that touches me so deeply. I have peace in the depth of my soul and have greater trust in His providence in my life. I am experiencing his divine sustenance as I have been able to climb this summer despite the fact that I am not getting better. People think that I am getting better, I am not. I am doing better though than I have in years. This is a grace and the One who brought it is my Master, Jesus.

I was reflecting on this great grace the other day in the car and I broke down in tears and simply cried. I am overwhelmed with my Master's mercy, love and providence in my life. I am so humbled that he would love me enough to stoop down and meet me in my pain and loneliness. He comes to where I am most scared and vulnerable bringing hope and joy. Amazing grace. Even though I still hurt physically I have joy in my soul, I am even beginning to recover my long lost laugh.

Knowing Jesus like I do now, that is in my pain, weakness, and brokenness has transformed his name for me. He is the One who brings to me in profound and life shattering ways graces like: love, forgiveness, strength, mercy, joy, hope and peace.

My Master is my Beloved. I thought I loved him before I was sick, and I did but it is not to the depth or with passion I now have. I can now weep at his name. This perhaps is the best thing that has come out of my sickness, the experience of the love and joy of Christ Jesus in all places.

My only response is to adore, love worship and serve my beloved Master: Jesus..